THE COUGHLIN AWARDS

In honor of my main man, Tom Coughlin, The Waco Chronicles will start a weekly awards post throughout the season in honor of the man who may have spent the worthless timeout in the history of sport during the first week of the NFL season.

Each week, The Waco Chronicles will honor the most bone-headed moves in college and professional football in hopes the people in charge realize they are paying people millions each year that may not even be able to successfully make correct change at the local McDonald's.

So, congratulations to this week's winners, Ron Prince of Kansas State and Bobby Ross of Army. May you never be forgiven for the atrocities you leveled on your teams this week.

Ron Prince wins the award this week for pulling something off that I have never seen done. Kansas State kicked off to Marshall at the start of the first and second half; and, to top it off, the Wildcats were forced to go into a 40 mph wind at the start of the fourth quarter. Yep. Marshall won the toss and deferred; and, for some unknown reason, Prince and Co. decided to defend the south goal instead of receiving the ball. Whatever.

Fortunately for Prince, Kansas State was playing Marshall, which is completely inept on the offensive side of the ball. Despite getting an extra possession due to Prince's complete lack of common sense, the Thundering Herd walked away with a loss.

As for Ross, he is the true winner of this dubious award. With Army at the Texas A&M three-yard line with 13 seconds left and facing a third-down, trailing by four and no time outs, Army ran the ball. Huh? What? ARE YOU SERIOUS?!?!?!?!

Instead of assuring Army of two chances to win the game by passing the ball on third and running OR passing the ball on fourth down, Ross put all his eggs in one basket and ran the ball on third down. The result, Texas A&M stopped the run and ran the clock out as Army could not get another play off in time. Nice move. Well done.

Instead of pulling off the big upset, Army allowed Texas A&M fans to do whatever it is they do while celebrating a big football victory. (Insert sleeping with goat or sheep joke here).

On a side note: While Ross and Prince go down as The Waco Chronicles inaugural winners, honorable mention to the officials of Oklahoma-Oregon. What an absolutely atrocious call. You guys would have been the hands-down winners this week; however, you screwed Oklahoma (which is a shining positive) and everybody already knows officials are nothing but incompetent jackasses. Congratulations on avoiding this negative distinction.